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This Post by Justin Dixon Follow me on Twitter Photo Courtesy of Yoshiffles

“It is no measure of health to be well adjusted to a profoundly sick society”~ Jiddu Krishnamurti

Soon we will all be going home to see our family members. We are going to sit eat and be merry. Until of course the topic changes to certain subjects. Politics, religion, money, and sexuality, you know the things that are intimately part of our lives. As soon as these topics are brought up there can be a number of reactions. Sometimes we just shy away from them. Sometimes we find the person who brought them up to be rude. Sometimes we participate in the discussion and get very upset.  Isn’t it curious though? The things that we most avoid talking about are often the things that effect our lives most directly. They are very personal, and very important, but we don’t talk about them.

Maybe its time to challenge this.

One of the most eye opening documentaries I have ever seen was the four part series Century of the Self. This documentary about the rise of modern psychology shows how much psychology and branding have changed our world.  One of the points brought up in it is that the early treatments for an abnormal mind, were to create a false uniform world around the patient so that the rational mind would be forced to strengthen itself. While this practice has over the years largely moved out of counseling and psychology there were policy and cultural changes that were made because of this belief. The practice stopped when it started to become apparent that rather than people becoming rationally stronger they were becoming repressed.

It became apparent that trying to rid ourselves of undesirable thoughts, or topics, does not address them. Stuffing down natural human behavior which we deem taboo, does not make the original thought go away. No matter how much we try to separate ourselves from these things. Most people will probably tell you that they want nothing to do with politics, but that they just want politics to leave them alone; a very political idea. The problem was that the everyday person had already been deemed as abnormal and in hopes of making a better world men in government made moves to apply what was than considered the appropriate treatments. Force people to suppress the “bad” thoughts, and the issues would just go away. Even though this practice was found to not work later in medicine through branding, and policy laws the world had already been changed for the treatment, and as a result, it is okay to talk about certain things that our important for your life, but not about others. Its okay to have some thoughts and not others.

“There are no evil thoughts except one; the refusal to think.”~ Ayn Rand

Now the family gathering is still not a good time to bring up topics that make everyone anger, but something does need to be done. When I look at the things that are worse in the world I see the taboos, the things that we refuse to talk about. Those are the things that run rampant and are often abused. We can change this, but we have to start choosing to acknowledge our own thoughts on taboo matters, and if we are to have peace we need to seek to understand the ideas that lead others to believe as they do about taboos.

We must learn to understand why we believe as we do , and why we don’t as those we differ from do. We must learn to be comfortable talking about religion, atheism, politics, money and sex. Not to make others angry, but to help them get out what they’ve been stuffing down. To no longer stuff down our own beliefs, but to address them.

If you run into a thought that you believe to be wrong, ask yourself why, and do not commit it to be wrong until you can find that answer. If someone wants to talk about the taboos don’t run away, that is your chance to learn to understand. That is the opportunity that we in this world have; to choose to do what it takes to make this world just a little better. Even when its difficult. Even when it makes us stand out. Even when its awkward.

Be at peace with your family this holiday. Don’t seek to upset anyone. Nor should you seek to prove your point right. Only learn to respect the thoughts of others, and to defend your ideas politely with reason. If the subjects turn taboo, than seek understanding first. This is part of living Ghandi’s famous challenge to all of us to be the change that we wish to see in the world.

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