6 Life Lessons From a Dynamic Woman (aka Thank You Jean Airoldi)
March 1, 2010
This Post by Justin Dixon Photo Courtesy of Adrienne Wright
Last night I received an email telling me that one of my favorite people in the world had passed on that morning. Now this isn’t my first time dealing with death. I’ve lost a friend in high school, my grandpa Larry, my uncle Ben, and now Jean Airoldi. The best way I know how to handle death is to take your favorite parts of someone and add them to yourself, that way you make sure that the best parts of someone will always live on. Jean had no shortage of life lessons to choose from. She had lived intelligently, successfully and dynamically. There is not a person I can think of that did not love being around Jean. So how did she become dear to so many people, and what lessons can we all learn from her?
1. Always Look for a Way to Give Joy. At the retirement community I worked at and where I met this wonderful woman every employee knew where Ms. Jean’s door was. She always had something on her landing to give away. Often she would have a bowl full of candy, and when she didn’t have that she at least would have something there to make you smile. This went beyond her door though. No matter where you saw Jean you could be sure she would be finding a way to make you smile.
2. Age is Just a Number. The most lovable people at this retirement community who had lived the most dynamic lives all had this attitude of “I’m young and dumb till the day I die and if I ever forget it I’m asking for trouble.” Jean was no exception. She never let her age be a barrier. She neither looked down on the young or the old. She treated everyone no matter there age with the same respect.
3. Genuinely Listen to People. If anyone ever had something to say Jean always listened to the fullest. If you said something that she liked she would affirm it. If you said something she didn’t like she would let you finish, and then let you know with her reasons. No matter what you had to say though she really listened, and it made a huge difference.
4. Think For Yourself. Jean always looked for independent ideas. Not just because these ideas were different, but because she wanted to hear as many perspectives as she could, and she never took any persons word for what she should believe over her own mind. Because of this her apartment was full of books, and her mind was constantly active.
5. A Sense of Humor Can Go A Long Way Jean had these signs on her door that she would change every once in a while. One read “Money isn’t everything but it sure keeps the kids in touch.” One would read “I’m smiling because I can’t hear you.” She had a whole series of these comments about aging, and everyone who saw them enjoyed them. No matter where she went she kept a way to make someone smile or laugh.
6. Believe in Others. Jean believed in me more than I believed in myself some days, and she let me know it every time she saw me. It is far too easy to doubt what we can do, because we so personally know our own limits (or are illusion of limits). Jean was one of the main voices that made me feel like something I had to say could mean enough to people for them to want to hear it. She reminded me that I don’t know my own limits as these limits constantly change. The fact is that when you believe in someone you don’t just call out greatness from them, you make them greater. You give them courage, inspiration, and hope. Through little conversations in between walking her dog, and helping her at the cafe Jean made me better a little bit at a time. This was made all the more powerful by how much she chose to believe in me.
I can only hope that these lessons will spread because these are the best things I remember about Ms. Jean, and I want to make sure those live on.
Ms. Jean thank you. Thank you for all the reasons you gave me to smile. Thank you for all the salt water taffy. Thank you for believing in me and calling out my best. Thank you for being such a great person to be around.
I can only hope that as many people as possible can take on these lessons, and that I can demonstrate these things as often as possible. This world needs more Jean Airoldis.
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1.
Belinda Munoz | March 1, 2010 at 3:35 pm
What a lovely tribute to someone you love, Justin. And so fitting for the start of International Women’s Month. I have my share of wise women and men who have moved on from their finite existence whose stories and love of life live on in my memory. I love your point about taking the best part of someone and integretating it into your life. Someone close to me told me that those we encounter will remember not our riches, or status or how right we are but how we make them feel. Sending you warm wishes on a gorgeous Monday.
2.
Justin- AlittleBetter | March 1, 2010 at 5:39 pm
I actually had no idea it was national woman’s month, but I’m glad you enjoyed the article. Thanks for stopping by. ^_^
3.
Melinda | March 1, 2010 at 6:50 pm
What a sweetheart you are Justin! Jean was lucky to have you in her life. And I agree with Belinda about what you said about taking the best part of someone and integretating it into your life – what a lovely and unique way to remember them!
Melinda
http://theeasyplace.wordpress.com/
4.
Justin- AlittleBetter | March 1, 2010 at 11:30 pm
I feel that I was more blessed to work with her. As for how I handle death, that is something I started when my Grandpa Larry died. I loved his off color and weird sense of humor, as well as the way I could talk to him about anything. I really started looking at death when I read the samurai code. According to the Samurai Code realizing that everyone is going to die makes you appreciate life more. So I took a lot of time really thinking about that.
5.
Meri Walker | March 2, 2010 at 3:40 pm
Living in a retirement community now, I get to enjoy this kind of beauty around me much more than I ever knew could be possible these days. I love this tribute, Justin. Especially the picture of Jean in that hat!! I want that hat!
No wonder you’re so wise for your age…you’ve been learning from the wise. Keep it up… It’s young people like you that let us see and appreciate our wisdom, whatever age we are.
6.
Justin- AlittleBetter | March 3, 2010 at 6:43 pm
I know they sell those hats at party stores around Mardi Gras. I can’t help but smile when I see that picture.
The only way I know to learn something is to ask those that are already doing it.
7.
Tony Airoldi | March 2, 2010 at 9:56 pm
Thank you Justin for the very kind words about my mother.
I know it would have meant a lot to her. You have a good heart.
I know you’ll do well in this life.
8.
Justin- AlittleBetter | March 3, 2010 at 11:55 am
Your mom meant a lot to me Tony. The small gestures she made for everyone made her dear to so many of us.
9.
Anastasiya | March 3, 2010 at 5:11 pm
I feel sorry for your loss, Justin, but the lessons you have learned from this amazing woman are wonderful. She seems like the most amazing person and you are lucky that you could learn so much from her.
10.
Justin- AlittleBetter | March 3, 2010 at 6:56 pm
Jean was tired, she had told me so more than once. I know that she was in pain. I know that she is no longer in that pain. She once told me that some friendships and some kinds of love go beyond just one life. She promised me we would see each other again, and I’m choosing to count on that. Also it makes me smile quite a bit to see her praised and recognized as the truly incredibly woman she was.
11.
Madeleine | March 3, 2010 at 9:54 pm
Justin, What a lovely tribute. Your list of lessons we can learn from the way Jean lived her life and the way she treated others is inspirational. This is really a message from your heart, and I appreciate it so much.
12.
Justin- AlittleBetter | March 4, 2010 at 9:14 am
These are the best things I can remember about Jean. As long as there are people who will take these lessons to heart than my favorite parts of Jean will never die.
13.
van brumley | March 4, 2010 at 12:36 am
Justin, Thank you for those words i got to enjoy jeans wisdom and kind words for over a year. I to know i will see her again someday. I can relate to her humor and all the candy left behind for the sweet tooth in all of us chocolate always makes your day go better.
i was her caregiver,friend,companion until the end she will be missed, i loved her so.
14.
Justin- AlittleBetter | March 4, 2010 at 9:16 am
And thank you for taking good care of my friend. I think it would be impossible to work with her on a consistent basis and not love her. That is why it is so important that we make sure the best parts of Jean live on.
15.
Robin Johnston | March 6, 2010 at 8:06 pm
Jean was brilliant, inquisitive, funny, talented, organized, involved, genuine, and full of life. May her legacy live on.
16.
Justin- AlittleBetter | March 10, 2010 at 11:32 am
And all that was just the basics.